Judge Says Being A Facebook Friend Isn't Like Real Friendship
from the glad-we-cleared-that-up dept
Turns out that your Facebook friends aren't necessarily real friends... under the law (at least in the UK). A UK judge has ruled that requesting to be a Facebook friend isn't the same as trying to become someone's real friend, which apparently matters in terms of harassment. The case concerned a woman who accused her ex-boyfriend of harassing her by requesting to be her friend on Facebook, but the judge apparently felt that since most people use Facebook and other social networks more as a list of acquaintances, it's hardly harassment to request to "friend" an ex.
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Semantic abuse by Crosbie Fitch on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 8:57am
Yup, 'friend' is well on the way to have its meaning corrupted by these social networking facilities.
Friend: Someone with whom you once exchanged an e-mail
'Some of my best friends are recruitment agencies'
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by john on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 9:30am
While reading this article, and I was struck that it probably was relevant to a social networking site, HumanBook, which has over 250 million profiles of people, including you, your friends, classmates and relatives.
The HumanBook is a mutually managed people directory. People list their own real-life connections, and other connections they have awareness of, to create a lifelong network. The network houses the connections, and then the collaboratively updated address book nurtures them, assuring that they need never be lost. HumanBook is the tool that will allow you to cherish and sustain all of the connections of your whole life. So if you're interested, go to http://www.HumanBook.com and find your profile today!
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Re: by TheDock22 on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 9:40am
While reading this article, and I was struck that it probably was relevant to a social networking site, HumanBook
How is it relevant at all to the article and not some shameless plug for yet another social networking site?
I don't necessarily think it's harassment to have some request to be your friend on Facebook or MySpace. I mean, you always have the option to ignore the request and move on with life. This lady had obvious issues above some dumb friend request.
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Re: john the spammer by Chuck Norris' Enemy (deceased) on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 9:51am
SPAM!
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How many times? by Chuck Norris' Enemy (deceased) on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 9:55am
I don't do the soc-net thing so I am not in the know about this but if someone requests your "friendship" and you deny them, are they unable to send requests again. I could see where it might get annoying if a person keeps sending "friend" requests after you have rejected them 1,000 times.
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Re: by Marty on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 9:57am
While reading this comment, and I was struck that I would never consider joining a social networking site that A) spams comment boards and B) doesn't proof-read its spam for grammatical accuracy.
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Re: How many times? by Marty on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 10:00am
You're correct. You cannot request again if you are denied. However, that person can initiate a friend request with you in the future should his or her mind change.
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Re: by Anonymous Coward on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 10:18am
Thanks. I will be contacting you to remove my information from your database.
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Re: HumanBook by Rev Erik on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 10:32am
I checked out Human Book, while it does have my name and old zipcode, the rest of it is useless. It's missing major cities, major 5 star schools, and major Fortune 500 companies. It seems like a way to collect data on people, let the spam begin...
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Re: Re: HumanBook by Chuck Norris' Enemy (deceased) on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 10:37am
Checked mine, too. They have the correct city and zip but my age was off by over a decade. I have a fairly uncommon name and live in a town of approx. 30k so I doubt it is someone with the same name? Didn't go past the sign in page though.
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Wow by Buzz on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 11:53am
I use Facebook. I reject friend requests from the various people to whom I have absolutely no connection. Even if there is a light connection (i.e. I know the person from an online forum or something), I tend to say no. Facebook is a great tool for keeping in touch with REAL FRIENDS. Anyone who goes onto Facebook or MySpace to FIND friends needs to use a handy little device in all homes called a "door".
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Re: Re: Re: HumanBook by krsd on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 11:58am
The real question though is how do you remove yourself from such a site... of course that is not something their page seems to answer.
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Re: Wow by TheDock22 on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 12:05pm
Facebook is a great tool for keeping in touch with REAL FRIENDS.
Exactly. I use it to keep in touch with friends, family, and old classmates. I would never accept a random friends request though. Every one of my "friends" are people I know face-to-face.
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Re: Re: Re: HumanBook by krsd on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 12:13pm
The real question though is how do you remove yourself from such a site... of course that is not something their page seems to answer.
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by Socially un-networked on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 12:17pm
Social networks do have good points, but I feel that they allow people to be far too open with each other without considering the consequences first. I for one will never touch them, because I don't feel the need for everybody in the world to be my "friend."
And the judge is right. A "friend" on a social network is often not a real friend at all, but rather an acquaintance, or perhaps a fair-weather friend. True friends stick with you through thick and thin, good and bad, etc. Such friendships are usually acquired through real-life interaction, not websites. I'm willing to bet most of the people on others' buddy lists will cut them loose the moment something bad goes down, unless said buddies are real friends in real life. While it's not impossible to form true friendships online, it would be difficult, in my opinion, to maintain them.
I know I'm generalizing a lot, and I apologize if this offends somebody. But honestly, I feel we have become a society that is obsessed with quantity instead of quality, and that mentality is extending beyond manufactured goods to things like friendships as well. Instead of having dozens of "friends" on a website, try keeping a few really close friends in real life, and see just how rewarding it can be. I for one try to choose my friends carefully, and I would much rather have a friend I can actually do things with than a faceless screen name from somebody across the world that I have to sit in front of a computer to talk with all the time.
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Re: Re: Re: Re: HumanBook by Peet McKimmie on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 12:36pm
The answer, I suspect, is that you don't try.
Maybe I'm just naturally suspicious, but a site like this that seems to have *some* of the data wrong about *everybody* sounds like a SPAMmer's dream - you see yourself, correct the info (or request that it be removed) and POW! you have verified that your details are, at least in part, genuine, thus making them more valuable for the site owner to sell on.
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Re: Semantic abuse by ehrichweiss on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 12:40pm
Well crap, some of MY best friends are CEOs just about to make an IPO, some killer pharmacies, and some girls who constantly want to chat with me as long as they have my credit card number. ;)
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Re: Re: Re: Re: HumanBook by ehrichweiss on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 12:47pm
Ok, they don't actually have your information on the site. They're likely using page scraping on sites like zabasearch.com to pull up the name, address, etc. *when you submit your information* and then they get the rest after you fill out their form.
So the real response to your question is: don't try to get it removed since it's likely not really there to begin with and any hint that your information is real is only going to give them a link to your name, address and an email address at which they can harass/spam you.
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by Rach on Mar 28th, 2008 @ 3:34pm
Actually, I disagree.
Being a facebook "friend" is STILL opening up more information than you might like, and if nothing else is an easy way to get all-too-personal with someone unless you explicitly block them. (and in the case of stubborn ex's, can still be used as an exploitable avenue of unwanted contact)
Maybe not "legally" harassment, sure, but damned if this woman should somehow be "forced" to friend/defriend whoever she likes.
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Re: by PaulT on Mar 29th, 2008 @ 2:18am
Did you read the actual case? The way I read it, the guy accepted the feature in Facebook that imports your address books and sends friend requests to everyone you have there. His ex, who he'd been told to stay out of contact with, happened to be one of those addresses.
It's dumb that this made it to court, but what the hell are you talking about "damned if this woman should somehow be "forced" to friend/defriend"? Click ignore when you get the request, no problem. No information is revealed (as long as you don't have a totally public profile, in which case whether someone's a friend is irrelevant) unless you accept the friend. The way it works with Facebook - you request someone as a friend, they say yes or no. Nothing's forced.
@#5: For me that would be the issue. Send one friend request - no problem just ignore it. Hundreds? Yeah, that's harassment. I think this case was only one message though.
@#11 & 13: Glad I'm not the only one. Facebook has been invaluable for me, getting back in touch with old friends and keeping in touch with people I know on 4 continents. Maybe the 14 year olds out there use it to try and "meet" new people and have the most friends on the site, but adults use it for useful purposes.
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Re: by Anonymous Coward on Mar 29th, 2008 @ 12:50pm
I agree but I have made two very close friends who's faces I have never seen... Two very close friends, and maybe 5 or so middle distance ones, out of around a hundred or so acquaintances who I hang out with online.
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